Wednesday, March 23, 2011

A moderately cautionary tale

A little backstory: One of Kelly's BFF's has a dad who is a mortgage banker by day, hard rock tribute band front man by night. He and his wife are good friends of ours, and our daughters are still great friends, even though they're in different grades, and more than 2 years apart in age. A couple of years back, he invited us to see his band perform on a local stage, and we went to the concert. It was a great show, and i was kicking myself that I didn't have a camera. I took a few photos on my phone, and shared them with him, and he was very gracious (as was the band), and I got a couple of FaceBook friend requests from various people that we had met at the concert. I swore that the next time, I would bring a better camera!

Fast forward to last week. His band is playing again, and i just HAPPEN to have rented the spectacular Nikon 70-200mm f/2 lens for a different gig. Hooray, I will get extra use out of the rental, I say, and I get out my biggest purse, and put that bad boy in the bottom of the purse, and strap a teeny 50mm f/1.8 lens on the camera for the 'getting in the door' portion of the evening.

We get to the concert early, and have no problems getting choice seats in the balcony, where we settle back and get ready to do an hour of people watching before the concert starts. We're there with friends, and we're having a grand time labeling people (because I am all about being judgmental). "There's the woman who's gonna let her shirt slide off her shoulders just a BIT too much after 2 more drinks." "That chick is gonna do something embarrassing before the night is done" "That guy looks like a shop teacher from 1950's middle America. He looks so out of place!" "See her high heels? She's gonna break her ankle before the night's over." "That is the most outlandish cleavage I have EVER seen" (followed immediately by "That's not cleavage. that's fat") etc, etc.

Soon, the concert was beginning. It was a grand show. There was a band on before our friend's band, and I warmed up by taking photos of them on stage. Just testing out the gear, of course.

And then I got a little bold, and moved away from my balcony view, and went down onto the dance floor. The bouncers didn't seem at all fazed by me. In fact, they held the drunken mobs out of the way, so I could get a better view. I guess this time, the giant lens said "I'm with the band" instead of "I'm a poseur that doesn't deserve your time". I liked it.

Soon, it was time for them to get off the stage, break it down, and set up for our friend's band. Fun times. By this point, the 'shirt-slippage chick' had not failed to entertain, and Plaid-shirted Shop Teacher dude was on his fourth beer (that we could count), still standing at the edge of the stage, and making devil horns. It was SO incongruous.

Ah, here they are!

Their lead guitar guy makes all the guitars for the band. He's quite the craftsman.

Bass player seems very Los Lobos to me.

Rhythm guitar guy is channeling Santana

I love coloured lights!

Drum bokeh!

It was getting to the end of the night, when suddenly "Lady who wouldn't be able to hold her booze" staggered towards the stage, and managed to climb up before the bouncers caught her. She was rocking out, and our friend was doing his best to be good natured about it. He kept on singing, while she gyrated, and then started stripping. Ok, she didn't strip totally. But she did take her sparkly scarf off, and wrap it around his neck.

This is what I like to call the "I am as FAR away from you as I can be without taking my feet off my mark." photo.

At this point, the bouncers managed to gently lead her off the stage, and escort her out of the building, everyone cheered wildly, and the music continued. We were in the last song, anyways, so it wasn't like she was gonna miss out on too much action.

Apparently, though, she had come with a 'date', who took offense, and followed the bouncers out of the theater.

When we left the venue only a few minutes later, it was to a scene of much activity for 1am. There were police cars, and lots of action on the sidewalk. And there was Overprotective Intoxicated Boyfriend giving the police officers a piece of his mind. "That bouncer is the one that should be arrested! He took a swing at me!"

Well, I couldn't resist! I had the camera with the low light lens, and I hadn't put the lens cap back on, so I just shot from the hip as we walked by the action. Ken was having kittens that I was going to get in trouble, but I just fired off a few shots as I walked by. Nobody was any the wiser. I didnt' even know if they would work. But lo and behold! One did!

Later that night, I couldn't resist, and when I was posting photos for the band to Facebook, I added this shot, tagging it with "Over protective Intoxicated Boyfriend" and "Friendly Bouncer" and "Diligent Police Officer"

That photo got a TON of comments. And lots of LIKES, and it was a hoot to watch the conversation. One guy couldn't get enough of the shot. First it was just a LOL. Then it was a LMFAO. Then he was "like"ing the comment that I should tag "overprotective intoxicated boyfriend", and then he was saying "That would have been TOO MUCH to see! Great shot!"

And then I thought "Hey, wait a minute. Who is this guy commenting on this photo?" When I friended him two years ago after the concert, I'd thought he was the band's drummer, but at the concert, it was obvious that the drummer was a completely different person. I went back to his profile (his profile photo was a pair of drumsticks, and he always posted on my wall about the concert information, hence the confusion), and when I finally found a photo of him...?

HE WAS OVERPROTECTIVE DRUNK BOYFRIEND, who is in the process of being detained by the police.

About an hour later, after I'd called my friend (the band front-man) who had indeed confirmed that my suspicions were correct (and had added "He's your FB friend? We all blocked him AGES AGO!") Overprotective Intoxicated Boyfriend must have sobered up, and realized that it was HIM IN THE PHOTO!

Suddenly, he cleared all of his "like" tags, and erased all of his comments on the photo.

I was mortified.

But at the same time? I couldn't stop laughing like a HYENA!

What are the odds?

Kids, let this be a lesson to you. Make sure you KNOW WHO YOUR FACEBOOK FRIENDS ARE.

This is a public service announcement from someone who should KNOW BETTER.

(*also, modestly amusing: Did anyone else notice that Overprotective Intoxicated Boyfriend is only wearing one shoe?)

No comments: