Kelly came bouncing home from school on Thursday with news.
On Valentine's Day, we all get to dress up like our Biography Hero. Isn't that great!? So I get to dress up like Betsy Ross. What did she wear?"
Ok, let's think about this. It's Thursday. In one week my daughter needs to dress up like a Revolutionary War Figure.
Nope. I don't happen to have any Revolutionary War era garments just kicking around. And poop, darn and rats, Joann's Fabrics isn't having their 99-cent pattern sale until the end of the month. I'm gonna have to...
pay full price for a pattern.
Oh! The Humanity!
But I suck it up, because I am a good mom like that, and we race off after school yesterday to grab a pattern while Skip is at game club after school, and Nate is still in class.
"Can I pick out fabric, mom?"
"Nope! If I have to pay full price for a pattern, I'm not gonna get dinged for the yardage, too. Oh look! Simplicity patterns are 40% off, anyways. Whew.... but you STILL can't buy fabric for the dress. I'm sure we have something at home... let's go!"
I think it was our fastest Joann's Expedition, ever.
This morning, after coming back from a meeting that Ken and I were invited to attend, I got down to work.
We had this old duvet cover that I'd made a few years back. I'd made a math error (yes! Can you believe it?), and the duvet cover had never been quite long enough for our bed, which irked Ken to no end, as his feet would stick out the bottom of the duvet, and get freezing cold every night. SO when I said "Honey, I'm going to cannibalize this old duvet cover for Kelly's Betsy Ross dress, is that ok?" he was over the moon with joy.
Goodbye, old duvet cover.
11 am. The pattern comes out.
12pm - 4pm Let's draw the curtain across the less-than-pretty sight of me fighting with the bodice, and saying unladylike words when the sleeves didn't obey my will.
Please. YOU would have said unkind words, too. Those sleeves had DARTS at the elbow! Darts!
There are no photos of this fiasco.
5pm: Hello Betsy Ross. Again.
Curtsey for the camera
Of course, then I looked up Betsy Ross on the internet, and saw that all the paintings of her have her wearing a very simple Quaker-style black or grey gown with severe white collar and cuffs. Whoopsie. Kelly is the "new" Betsy Ross. The one that left the Quaker church, and was disowned after she married John Ross in the Church of England tradition. Yup. That's what she is, all right.
An excerpt from Gulley about Autocorrect
12 hours ago